VIDEO Coaching - how to have a successful session

There are some key differences and also many similarities to the way we would hold an effective face-to-face session.

So below are some top tips for transformational virtual coaching.

1. SORT OUT LOGISTICS

It is important to consider the location you are use for your virtual coaching session — so you can be relaxed and free from distractions. Be in a private space, free from that which might distract you.

There may be conversations to be had with loved ones at home to ensure you’re free from interruptions. If you have a partner working at home, you may need to consider not sitting near a printer in case they choose that critical moment to send a 50 page report to print!

Ensure you test your broadband speed and connectivity – working closer to your router can help.

I recommend reflecting on your own energy patterns; if you are a morning person it may be better to avoid booking a session later in the day and vice versa. You can, of course, discuss this with me as your coach to find the best time for both of us.

2. PREPARE YOUR TECHNOLOGY AND YOURSELF

Before coaching online, download and test the platform that you will be using and get to know its functionality. I often use Zoom, which I find to be reliable and feature-rich. Skype, Whatsapp video chat or FaceTime can be used if necessary, but are less ideal.

In Zoom (and similar apps) you can turn on a ‘speaker view’ so the other person will appear large on the screen (a useful post-it note over your image can also remove any distractions caused by seeing yourself on the screen!).

Closing down other applications will support your presence and the transmission speed too; using a good microphone and headphones will help with the sound.

For some, online coaching may initially be daunting and create a level of anxiety. It is important therefore for us to contract about your experiences of working online — especially if we have previously been meeting face-to-face.

I’ll take time to ensure you feel familiar with the platform you will be using; since I might need to highlight what will help you to be present in the session e.g. closing down applications, wearing headphones to support confidentiality, turning off mobile and house phones etc.

To support any exploratory work I would invite you to have a journal, paper and pens ready.

3. PLAN FOR POTENTIAL CHALLENGES

It is important for us to anticipate and plan for various challenges that can occur when coaching virtually. Examples include:

Loss of broadband connection — I’ll ensure I have your telephone number in case we need to switch to a telephone.
External interruptions such as a deliveries or loud noises outside (building or gardening work etc.) — you may need to use mute when you are not talking if you have a lot of background noise and we can contract for any unplanned interruptions, so we know what to do if any arise.
Family members or pets at home – it is possible you will have other people or animals in your house. This sometimes causes anxiety about potential interruptions so I encourage you to ‘metaphorically include’ their energy, as I find that this helps both my clients and I relax. Let’s just accept that the dog may bark or the cat may sit on your lap!
Poor broadband speed — this can mean that web cameras can’t be used. If we need to work with voice/audio only, I will regularly check in with you on how you are processing what we are discussing and exploring, since I won’t be able to see how you are reacting to what is being discussed. Questions I might ask include “What are you aware of?” and “What are you noticing as we discuss this?” Or, I may check-in with you during long pauses – “what is happening for you now?” In short - I will be asking you to report more on what is happening for you during the session than I might have previously.

4. BE PRESENT

Coaching from home can make you feel more relaxed than if you’re in a physical meeting space — so consider what supports you to be in a present and connected state of being before receiving a client online.

Building in some time before the session to prepare can be useful for enabling you to be in flow (a state of relaxed concentration).

This 8 minute ‘3 part breathing space’ exercise (MP3) from my friends at Catalyst 14 can help you achieve presence before an online coaching session.

5. HELPING YOU TO BE PRESENT

You may arrive for a coaching session from another virtual work meeting — and so still be in a mode of “doing”. Your mind may therefore be a little distracted by those prior conversations.

The initial moments of our session are vital in reconnecting with each other. Underneath everything, our ability to create an authentic and trusting online relationship is the critical ingredient for success in your coaching. A lot will have happened for you since we were last together, so it is important that we connect as human beings before moving into the coaching space. I’ll help you get present for our conversation before we move into contracting on what you want to use the session for.

6. CONTRACT

Whilst I will cover all the usual aspects of the session contract — confidentiality, time, how we will work together, challenge — I will also contract for the things that are different when we are working online, for example:

How I will manage the unexpected such as interruptions and loss of connection.
How I will use models online — e.g. I may wish to share a model on my screen that you can draw on using a whiteboard facility. Or you may prefer me to email the model to you, so you can print off and work on it on your desk.
How I will use creative techniques online — e.g. “I am going to give you more space as I cannot see you” (i.e., if you are standing or moving in the room) and “I am going to pause you from time to time to see if you are ready for the next question”. If am going to use a visualisation exercise where you need to have your eyes closed, I will remind you that if either of us loses internet connection, it is fine; I will simply re-join the session again and pick up where we left off.

7. BE HONEST AND AUTHENTIC ABOUT WORKING ONLINE

This is an authentic relationship: if you are feeling nervous about working virtually, please let me know. Be honest and authentic; if you want to share that you are new to working in this way then do so.

8. TRUST THE PROCESS

Remember to trust the process; transformational coaching is built from the strength and honesty of the relationship between us - you as the client and me as your coach.

Pay attention to what is happening between you and I and try to listen with all of your senses in the same way you would when you are face-to-face. If you are feeling lost during the session or a particular exercise then feel free to say so!

9. TRUST YOURSELF

Be fully present and trust all the skills and strengths you have and your intent of using this time to further your learning and development. Just because we are working virtually does not mean we cannot have a meaningful conversation and rich experience.

10. BE MINDFUL OF YOUR ENERGY

When working virtually, we might experience that we use our energy in a different way.

It might feel more intense — and you might have to work harder to stay present. We can take a break during longer sessions (longer than 45 minutes); and get some some fresh air (weather permitting).

During these breaks, you and I should stretch and breathe; ideally don’t check phones or emails during this time, since this will distract your focus.

11. GET OUR ENDING RIGHT

When running a virtual coaching session, I will contract with you to ensure you have some space between the coaching session and your next virtual meeting to replenish your energy.

I will ensure we have enough time to fully wrap up the session and close it down without the need to rush.

I hope the above tips support you in preparing for effective virtual coaching and virtual meetings in general, and help you enjoy the development work we will do together.