Chapter 8 of Fred Kofman’s book gives an excellent overview and suggested steps.
https://hbr.org/video/2804434484001/build-your-emotional-agility
RAIN
RECOGNISE - call upon the mindful witness. I notice aversion to my scars and my weight.
ALLOW - create some space. This belongs. It is a wave on the ocean. Let it be there. Let this aversion be there.
INVESTIGATE - let there be a quality of gentleness and curiosity, - what am I believing when I turn on myself? Unworthy? Undesireablity? Never wanted? Not loveable? Not attractive? Feel the unpleasantness. That feeling of shame, of badness. Put hand on heart to feel connected with what’s going on inside.
NURTURE- Look through the eyes of a wise compassionate being or a loving friend and see the suffering that is there. Of self aversion. See the streams of conditioning that shaped me. How did I learn to be the way I am? Is this shaped by messages from others? How did it get there? I wasn’t born as a bad person. Was there past trauma? What created the very thing I’m adversities too. Send the message inwards; “it’s not your fault.” Let it be bathed with compassion. Sense the possibility of letting in that loving and becoming one with it.
Sense, Who are you when you believe nothing is wrong with you? Trust the gold. Look at the patterning and ask “what’s my deepest intention from the gold?” It is to lovel purely! “What will help me align with their deepest intention?” The secret self is loving awareness.
Remember the gold. Trust the gold - our basic goodness.
Feeling Safe in an Unsafe World (Ed Batista)
https://www.edbatista.com/2020/08/feeling-safe-in-an-unsafe-world.html
M for mindfulness, and the most reliable path to a mindful state is meditation. There are other practices, such walking, time in nature, certain forms of exercise. The research on meditation suggests that if we meditate on a consistent daily basis for about 10 minutes, we’ll start to experience some distinctions in our ability to regulate our emotions after about two months. [3]
E for exercise, and a regular commitment to physical activity is important because emotions are physiological events before they register in consciousness. When we're more regularly active on a consistent basis, we're better attuned to what we're feeling earlier in the process. [4]
S for sleep, which is incredibly important--an ample body of research shows that when we are not well rested our ability to regulate our emotions diminishes significantly. [5]
And another S for reducing chronic stress. To be very clear, I'm not suggesting that we should be striving to live in a stress-free world--that's impossible, especially these days. Nor do we need to view stressful experiences as inherently negative--it's how we respond to those experiences that matters. But there are often a number of low-level chronic stressors in our life that we can minimize or remove with some modest changes.
By committing to these kinds of simple practices on a consistent basis, we can enhance our ability to regulate our emotions and take some meaningful steps towards feeling safer in an unsafe world.
https://www.bbc.com/reel/video/p08bl6tl/how-a-simple-breathing-trick-can-change-your-life
Dysregulated brain - Listen to @dr.zelana, behavioral scientist, and bestselling author @drdansiegel discuss the power of showing up for ourselves, family and friends, how to cultivate rewarding friendships, ways we can navigate these trying times with hope and resilience, and much more! https://www.instagram.com/tv/CDkAScdh_n2/?igshid=1gwweqe7p73eo
Emotional states and the chemicals that link to them:
https://scottishconflictresolution.org.uk/homunculus